Michael's Secrets by Milton Stern

Author:Milton Stern [Stern, Milton]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2009-04-03T04:00:00+00:00

* * * * *

Michael stood there in the living room, staring at them and asked Mr. Sagman calmly, “Did you work with my father?”

He spoke up, “Yes, I did, until we moved up here in the summer of 1962.”

“And, you knew all along you were my father?” Michael asked, not really wanting to know the answer.

Mr. Sagman looked down at the floor and nodded yes.

Michael grew angrier and yelled at him, “And, you knew what a controlling abusive bitch my mother was, and you did not even come to see me to check on me? You allowed me to grow up in that hellhole, not knowing what became of me? And, I am supposed to accept this as if everything is springtime and roses? I should kick you two out of here, but it is your son’s apartment. I wish to fuck I never came to Washington. I don’t fucking believe this! Do you know how horrible my childhood was? Do you have any fucking idea? Do you know how screwed up I am to this day because of that living hell? Do you? Do You?”

Neither said anything as their eyes opened in horror, as they were not expecting such an outburst. Michael imagined Eric never lost his temper, since he seemed in the few minutes he met him to be a happy-go-lucky guy. Michael was shaking uncontrollably at this point, so he walked into the kitchen, reached into the cabinet above the refrigerator for his emergency pack of cigarettes and walked out the front door.

He stood there smoking for a while before Mrs. Sagman came out to check on him.

“You really shouldn’t smoke, it’ll kill you,” she said as if she were his mother.

He looked at her and said, “You are not my mother. I had a mother, and God knows I don’t want another one.”

“Look, Michael, I know this is difficult. Believe me. I wanted for years to contact you, but Seymour wouldn’t let me. He was afraid of your mother. From what you just said in there, you probably were, also. I didn’t know her well, but I knew she was secretive and controlling with a horrible temper. She probably preferred to keep your father’s identity a secret also.”

He blew the smoke in her face. “My mother was only concerned with herself. She never answered questions. Never! She would lie right in front of me and everyone for that matter. And, no one knew what it was like in that house because we had to put up a front. She controlled everything, including what she believed to be the truth,” Michael said as he put out the cigarette and immediately lit another one.

“I know,” she said.

“She also hated me,” he said.

Michael bent down and grabbed her hand. She appeared nervous as he did this, but Michael placed it on the back of his head anyway.

“Do you feel that bump?” he asked.

“Yes,” she said, her voice shaking.

“That’s from when my mother’s second husband shoved my head through a wall while she watched.

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